One Minister's Musings: Prayer and Resilience

When I was a child, I was taught that there are two equally important parts to prayer. The first is intercessory prayer – prayers for others and prayer for your needs.

The second prayer as a time to reflect. Sometimes this would take place as a time of silence, other times singing Jesus Loves Me or saying the Lord’s Prayer.

As a child I understood this in two ways that reflected my spiritual development and life experience. Firstly, I understood prayers as asking God for something – others to be nice, protection for my family, and even prayers for the good of my imaginary friend – Kangaroo. The silent part was never easy for me – I had too many wiggles in me to stay still

At the tender age of 6, my life experience had taught me that prayers do not always “work.” God is not a Santa Clause figure that is giving out gifts that we have asked for. I prayed that my sister would get well and not die, that my parents would not be so sad, that the tearing grief in my family and my soul would stop. These prayers did not “work” my sister did die, my parents were sad, the tearing grief of our family and friends continued.

When a dear family friend, Nancy, came to take care of my sister and I as my parents grieved, she taught me a great lesson – most likely from her own experience. She taught me that we do not pray for things to happen or not happen – but to pray for the strength to get through what is happening. This is a radical lesson for anyone, but especially a 6 year old.

Now I cannot say that the lesson immediately took- I still prayed for a bike and the doll I wanted. You know the prayers, an imaginary friend not get you in trouble, sister sharing toys, the bike I really wanted (did I mention I wanted a bike?) Yet, I also prayed, even when I did not know or have the words, for strength and love to get through the difficulties of life.

Slowly prayers became asking for patience, for strength, for hope, and resilience. Slowly, I saw that prayer and the work of community brings more hope, more love, and more justice into this world.